Portfolio roasts gallery
Brutally honest AI portfolio reviews in the voice of legendary investors. Browse the latest roasts — then unleash one on your own portfolio.
Roast my portfolio 🔥
Roasted by Warren Buffett
Sat…RA
37 assets · 0% cash
Roasted by Warren Buffett
Buffett Roasts Your Portfolio: The Great Income Generation Illusion
12 assets · 0% cash
Roasted by Warren Buffett
Buffett: Why Your Tech-Heavy Portfolio Needs More Than Just Big Moats
13 assets · 0% cash
Roasted by Warren Buffett
Buffett Roasts Your Tech-Heavy Portfolio: A Recipe for Confusion
12 assets · 0% cash
Roasted by Warren Buffett
Buffett: Why Your 94% Cash Hoard is Killing Your Long-Term Returns
1 assets · 94.1% cash
Roasted by Stanley Druckenmiller
Druckenmiller: Why Your Lazy VTI Strategy Is Just Financial Gambling
7 assets · 0% cash
Roasted by Bill Ackman
Ackman Roasts Your Diworsified Portfolio: Stop Renting the Market
31 assets · 8.8% cash
Roasted by Warren Buffett
Buffett's Verdict on Your ETF Soup: Why Less Is Often More
17 assets · 0.5% cash
Roasted by Kevin O'Leary
Mr. Wonderful's Verdict: Why Your ETF Overlap Is Killing Returns
17 assets · 0.5% cash
Roasted by Michael Burry
Burry's Verdict: Why Your Fund-Heavy Portfolio Is Built to Sink
15 assets · 0% cash
Roasted by Warren Buffett
Buffett Breaks Down Your Overly Complicated UK Investment Trust Setup
15 assets · 0% cash
Roasted by Jim Simons
Simons Roasts Your 4-Asset Portfolio: Why Your Gold Bet Is Failing
4 assets · 0% cash
Roasted by Ray Dalio
Ray Dalio Roast: Why Your All-Weather Machine Needs More Risk Parity
4 assets · 0% cash
Roasted by Stanley Druckenmiller
Druckenmiller: Why Your 3/10 Portfolio Is Built for Total Disaster
12 assets · 0% cash
Roasted by Cathie Wood
Cathie Wood Reviews Your Portfolio: Why You Are Playing It Too Safe
12 assets · 0% cash
Roasted by Nancy Pelosi
Pelosi Analyzes Your Tech-Heavy Portfolio: A 5/10 Legislative Flop
10 assets · 0% cash
Roasted by Warren Buffett
Buffett Roasts Your Tech-Heavy Portfolio: Stop Swinging at Mirages
10 assets · 0% cash
Roasted by The Dividend Grandpa
Dividend Grandpa Roasts Your Growth Portfolio: Income vs. Compounding
5 assets · 0% cash
Roasted by Peter Lynch
Lynch Roasts Your Growth ETF: Why You Bought Income Instead
5 assets · 0% cash
Roasted by The Degenerate
Degenerate Review: High-Stakes KKR Bets vs. Boomer Dividend Drags
6 assets · 0% cash
Roasted by Howard Marks
Marks: Why Your Concentrated Portfolio Lacks a Margin of Safety
6 assets · 0% cash
Roasted by The Momentum Chaser
The Momentum Chaser: 6 Risky Stocks That Need a Reality Check
6 assets · 0% cash
Roasted by Warren Buffett
Buffett Roasts Your Sensible Index Core and Speculative Tech Bets
8 assets · 0.5% cash
Roasted by Ray Dalio
4 reasons Ray Dalio warns this doom-prepared portfolio will fail
8 assets · 21% cash
Roasted by Kevin O'Leary
A 3/10 Disaster: O'Leary Mocks Your Luxury Watch and Makeup Portfolio
4 assets · 4.2% cash
Roasted by Stanley Druckenmiller
74% in Three Assets: Druckenmiller Roasts Your Reckless Macro Bet
6 assets · 2.3% cash
Roasted by Nancy Pelosi
Pelosi's Verdict: Why Your Tech-Heavy Portfolio Needs an Audit
41 assets · 7.7% cash
Roasted by Cathie Wood
Cathie Wood Reviews Your 24% Tesla Bet and Legacy Index Overlap
41 assets · 7.7% cash
Roasted by Nancy Pelosi
3 Risks Pelosi Spotted in Your 98% Tech-Heavy Portfolio Strategy
7 assets · 2.3% cash
Roasted by Michael Saylor
Is Your 93% Biotech Portfolio Just One Clinical Trial From Ruin?
8 assets · 6.4% cash
Roasted by Kevin O'Leary
Kevin O'Leary Roasts Your 3/10 Portfolio: Too Much Defense, No Cash
48 assets · 0% cash
Roasted by Warren Buffett
3 Dangerous Concentration Traps Warren Buffett Found In Your Aerospace Bet
6 assets · 3.2% cash
Roasted by Cathie Wood
Is Cathie Wood Right That Your Utility-Heavy AI Bet Is a Trap?
10 assets · 0.8% cash
Roasted by Kevin O'Leary
Is Your Energy-Heavy Portfolio One Regulatory Crisis From Disaster?
9 assets · 3% cash
Roasted by Warren Buffett
Buffett's Verdict: Why Your Tech-Heavy Portfolio Needs Cash Now
19 assets · 0% cash
Roasted by Howard Marks
81% in One Region: Howard Marks Critiques Your Australian Bank Bet
8 assets · 4.8% cash
Roasted by Ray Dalio
Stagflation Risk: Dalio Roasts Your Defensive Yield Portfolio Trap
10 assets · 4.3% cash
Roasted by Jim Simons
A Polish Banking Trap: Jim Simons Unpacks Your Risky Concentrated Bet
8 assets · 6.4% cash
Roasted by Warren Buffett
Buffett on Your Energy-Heavy Bet: Why 90% in Crude Is Playing with Fire
8 assets · 7.1% cash
Roasted by Cathie Wood
Is Your Speculative Portfolio Actually Betting Against Innovation?
8 assets · 1.4% cash
Roasted by Michael Saylor
3 Critical Ways Saylor Says Your Tech Portfolio Is Leaking Value
6 assets · 4.2% cash
Roasted by Peter Lynch
A 5/10 Rating: Peter Lynch Grades Your High-Stakes Nuclear Portfolio
7 assets · 4.3% cash
Roasted by Peter Lynch
Lynch's Verdict: Is Your Schwab-Heavy Portfolio Too Timid to Grow?
5 assets · 0% cash
Roasted by Nancy Pelosi
Too Much Defensive Drag: Nancy Pelosi Roasts Your All-Weather Portfolio
10 assets · 3.4% cash
Roasted by Warren Buffett
Why Buffett Says Your 60% Bond Allocation Will Kill Your Compounding
18 assets · 0% cash
Roasted by Jim Simons
3 Mathematical Flaws Jim Simons Spotted in Your India Portfolio
8 assets · 6.4% cash
Roasted by Warren Buffett
Buffett on Your Income Snowball: Why 8/10 Is Still Not Quite Enough
10 assets · 4.2% cash
Roasted by Warren Buffett
Buffett’s Roast: Why Your Global Index Strategy Is Being Undermined
14 assets · 4% cash
Portfolio roasts — frequently asked questions
What is a portfolio roast?
A portfolio roast is an AI-powered review of your investment portfolio written in the voice of a legendary investor. It analyzes your asset allocation, sector and geographic concentration, diversification, red flags, and competitive moats, then delivers a verdict scored out of 10 — across an introduction, deep analysis, red flags, and final verdict.
How much does a portfolio roast cost?
Nothing to start. Every account comes with a pool of AI analyses included, and a roast runs on that pool — no credit card, no subscription, and no brokerage account linking. You enter your holdings as allocation percentages and get a full AI analysis you can share at a public URL. If you use the pool up, more AI is the one thing in PortfolioGlance you can pay for; tracking and analytics stay free.
Which investors can roast my portfolio?
Twelve legendary investor personas, each analyzing through their own philosophy: Warren Buffett (value investing), Stanley Druckenmiller (global macro), Cathie Wood (disruptive innovation), Nancy Pelosi (legislative alpha), Ray Dalio (macro / risk parity), Michael Burry (contrarian deep value), Jim Simons (quantitative), Michael Saylor (Bitcoin maximalism), Kevin O'Leary (cashflow & dividends), Bill Ackman (activist / concentrated), Peter Lynch (growth at a reasonable price), and Howard Marks (risk & market cycles). You can also pick one of six investing-style personas if you would rather be judged by a style than by a name.
Is my financial data private?
Yes. A roast never shows monetary amounts — only allocation percentages, asset classes, and tickers. There is no brokerage or bank account linking; you enter holdings manually and stay in full control of your data.