Portfolio roasts gallery
Brutally honest AI portfolio reviews in the voice of legendary investors. Browse the latest roasts — then unleash one on your own portfolio.
Roast my portfolio 🔥
Roasted by Nancy Pelosi
Pelosi Analyzes Your Tech-Heavy Portfolio: A 5/10 Legislative Flop
10 assets · 0% cash
Roasted by Warren Buffett
Buffett Roasts Your Tech-Heavy Portfolio: Stop Swinging at Mirages
10 assets · 0% cash
Roasted by The Dividend Grandpa
Dividend Grandpa Roasts Your Growth Portfolio: Income vs. Compounding
5 assets · 0% cash
Roasted by Peter Lynch
Lynch Roasts Your Growth ETF: Why You Bought Income Instead
5 assets · 0% cash
Roasted by The Degenerate
Degenerate Review: High-Stakes KKR Bets vs. Boomer Dividend Drags
6 assets · 0% cash
Roasted by Howard Marks
Marks: Why Your Concentrated Portfolio Lacks a Margin of Safety
6 assets · 0% cash
Roasted by The Momentum Chaser
The Momentum Chaser: 6 Risky Stocks That Need a Reality Check
6 assets · 0% cash
Roasted by Warren Buffett
Buffett Roasts Your Sensible Index Core and Speculative Tech Bets
8 assets · 0.5% cash
Roasted by Ray Dalio
4 reasons Ray Dalio warns this doom-prepared portfolio will fail
8 assets · 21% cash
Roasted by Kevin O'Leary
A 3/10 Disaster: O'Leary Mocks Your Luxury Watch and Makeup Portfolio
4 assets · 4.2% cash
Roasted by Stanley Druckenmiller
74% in Three Assets: Druckenmiller Roasts Your Reckless Macro Bet
6 assets · 2.3% cash
Roasted by Nancy Pelosi
Pelosi's Verdict: Why Your Tech-Heavy Portfolio Needs an Audit
41 assets · 7.7% cash
Roasted by Cathie Wood
Cathie Wood Reviews Your 24% Tesla Bet and Legacy Index Overlap
41 assets · 7.7% cash
Roasted by Nancy Pelosi
3 Risks Pelosi Spotted in Your 98% Tech-Heavy Portfolio Strategy
7 assets · 2.3% cash
Roasted by Michael Saylor
Is Your 93% Biotech Portfolio Just One Clinical Trial From Ruin?
8 assets · 6.4% cash
Roasted by Kevin O'Leary
Kevin O'Leary Roasts Your 3/10 Portfolio: Too Much Defense, No Cash
48 assets · 0% cash
Roasted by Warren Buffett
3 Dangerous Concentration Traps Warren Buffett Found In Your Aerospace Bet
6 assets · 3.2% cash
Roasted by Cathie Wood
Is Cathie Wood Right That Your Utility-Heavy AI Bet Is a Trap?
10 assets · 0.8% cash
Roasted by Kevin O'Leary
Is Your Energy-Heavy Portfolio One Regulatory Crisis From Disaster?
9 assets · 3% cash
Roasted by Warren Buffett
Buffett's Verdict: Why Your Tech-Heavy Portfolio Needs Cash Now
19 assets · 0% cash
Roasted by Howard Marks
81% in One Region: Howard Marks Critiques Your Australian Bank Bet
8 assets · 4.8% cash
Roasted by Ray Dalio
Stagflation Risk: Dalio Roasts Your Defensive Yield Portfolio Trap
10 assets · 4.3% cash
Roasted by Jim Simons
A Polish Banking Trap: Jim Simons Unpacks Your Risky Concentrated Bet
8 assets · 6.4% cash
Roasted by Warren Buffett
Buffett on Your Energy-Heavy Bet: Why 90% in Crude Is Playing with Fire
8 assets · 7.1% cash
Roasted by Cathie Wood
Is Your Speculative Portfolio Actually Betting Against Innovation?
8 assets · 1.4% cash
Roasted by Michael Saylor
3 Critical Ways Saylor Says Your Tech Portfolio Is Leaking Value
6 assets · 4.2% cash
Roasted by Peter Lynch
A 5/10 Rating: Peter Lynch Grades Your High-Stakes Nuclear Portfolio
7 assets · 4.3% cash
Roasted by Peter Lynch
Lynch's Verdict: Is Your Schwab-Heavy Portfolio Too Timid to Grow?
5 assets · 0% cash
Roasted by Nancy Pelosi
Too Much Defensive Drag: Nancy Pelosi Roasts Your All-Weather Portfolio
10 assets · 3.4% cash
Roasted by Warren Buffett
Why Buffett Says Your 60% Bond Allocation Will Kill Your Compounding
18 assets · 0% cash
Roasted by Jim Simons
3 Mathematical Flaws Jim Simons Spotted in Your India Portfolio
8 assets · 6.4% cash
Roasted by Warren Buffett
Buffett on Your Income Snowball: Why 8/10 Is Still Not Quite Enough
10 assets · 4.2% cash
Roasted by Warren Buffett
Buffett’s Roast: Why Your Global Index Strategy Is Being Undermined
14 assets · 4% cash
Roasted by Ray Dalio
Utilities Overdose: Ray Dalio Flays Your Fragile Danish Portfolio
9 assets · 6.2% cash
Roasted by Kevin O'Leary
Is Your Tech-Heavy Portfolio a Financial Suicide Mission for You?
8 assets · 1.2% cash
Roasted by Howard Marks
Howard Marks on Your Speculative Tech Bet: A 2.5 Out of 10 Disaster
10 assets · 2.3% cash
Roasted by Cathie Wood
3 Dangerous Concentration Risks Cathie Wood Found in Your GLP-1 Bet
7 assets · 2.8% cash
Roasted by Michael Saylor
63% in Three Stocks: Michael Saylor Reviews Your Space Portfolio
9 assets · 5.7% cash
Roasted by Warren Buffett
Why Buffett Calls Your 100% Bitcoin Portfolio a 1/10 Casino Gamble
1 assets · 0% cash
Roasted by Peter Lynch
4 red flags Lynch found in this defensive gold portfolio
9 assets · 11.4% cash
Roasted by Warren Buffett
Buffett's Verdict on This 6.5/10 Portfolio: Drop the Leveraged ETFs
3 assets · 0% cash
Roasted by Warren Buffett
Buffett Slams This Zero-Cash, High-Tech Portfolio with a 5.5/10
10 assets · 0% cash
Roasted by Cathie Wood
Wood Demands You Cut Micron: Inside a 4.5/10 Tech Portfolio Roast
7 assets · 0% cash
Roasted by Warren Buffett
Why Buffett Rates This Micron-Heavy Tech Portfolio a 3/10
7 assets · 0% cash
Roasted by Warren Buffett
Why Buffett Graded This Tech-Heavy Portfolio an 8/10 Despite 0% Cash
19 assets · 0% cash
Roasted by Nancy Pelosi
Pelosi Roasts Safe 3/10 Portfolio: Defund the Gold Bunker
9 assets · 4.3% cash
Roasted by Cathie Wood
Cathie Wood's 4.5/10 Roast: Ditch the Emerging Market Index Trap
10 assets · 5.5% cash
Roasted by Nancy Pelosi
Pelosi ocenia portfel na 6.5: Za dużo gotówki i brak Nvidii!
12 assets · 22.8% cash
Portfolio roasts — frequently asked questions
What is a portfolio roast?
A portfolio roast is a free, AI-powered review of your investment portfolio written in the voice of a legendary investor. It analyzes your asset allocation, sector and geographic concentration, diversification, red flags, and competitive moats, then delivers a verdict scored out of 10 — across an introduction, deep analysis, red flags, and final verdict.
How much does a portfolio roast cost?
Nothing. Portfolio roasts are free — no credit card, no subscription, and no brokerage account linking. You enter your holdings as allocation percentages and get a full AI analysis you can share at a public URL.
Which investors can roast my portfolio?
Twelve legendary investor personas, each analyzing through their own philosophy: Warren Buffett (value investing), Stanley Druckenmiller (global macro), Cathie Wood (disruptive innovation), Nancy Pelosi (legislative alpha), Ray Dalio (macro / risk parity), Michael Burry (contrarian deep value), Jim Simons (quantitative), Michael Saylor (Bitcoin maximalism), Kevin O'Leary (cashflow & dividends), Bill Ackman (activist / concentrated), Peter Lynch (growth at a reasonable price), and Howard Marks (risk & market cycles).
Is my financial data private?
Yes. A roast never shows monetary amounts — only allocation percentages, asset classes, and tickers. There is no brokerage or bank account linking; you enter holdings manually and stay in full control of your data.