Portfolio roasts gallery
Legendary investors review real portfolios. Browse the latest roasts, then get one for yours.
Roast my portfolio
Roasted by Peter Lynch
Peter Lynch Roasts a 42% Gold Portfolio: Why Rocks Won't Be Tenbaggers
BGBL.AX · Gold · 0P00017844 · GOLDBEES.BO
13 assets · 0% cash
Roasted by Peter Lynch
7/10Peter Lynch Roasts a 7/10 Global ETF Portfolio: Parking Brake Error?
VWRP · VAGS · IWFV · IGL5
5 assets · 0% cash
Roasted by Peter Lynch
5/10Lynch Roasts Your Growth ETF: Why You Bought Income Instead
SCHD · DIVO · SCHY · JEPI
5 assets · 0% cash
Roasted by Peter Lynch
5/10A 5/10 Rating: Peter Lynch Grades Your High-Stakes Nuclear Portfolio
CCJ · CEG · LEU · UEC
7 assets · 4.3% cash
Roasted by Peter Lynch
6/10Lynch's Verdict: Is Your Schwab-Heavy Portfolio Too Timid to Grow?
SCHZ · SCHB · SGOV · SCHF
5 assets · 0% cash
Roasted by Peter Lynch
4.5/104 red flags Lynch found in this defensive gold portfolio
VT · GLD · TLT · PDBC
9 assets · 11.4% cash
Portfolio roasts — frequently asked questions
What is a portfolio roast?
A portfolio roast is an AI-powered review of your investment portfolio written in the voice of a legendary investor. It analyzes your asset allocation, sector and geographic concentration, diversification, red flags, and competitive moats, then delivers a verdict scored out of 10 — across an introduction, deep analysis, red flags, and final verdict.
How much does a portfolio roast cost?
Nothing to start. Every account comes with a pool of AI analyses included, and a roast runs on that pool: no credit card, no subscription, and no brokerage account linking. You type in each holding's quantity (the buy price is optional) or import a statement from your broker, and get a full AI analysis you can share at a public URL. If you use the pool up, more AI is the one thing in PortfolioGlance you can pay for; tracking and analytics stay free.
Which investors can roast my portfolio?
Twelve legendary investor personas, each analyzing through their own philosophy: Warren Buffett (value investing), Stanley Druckenmiller (global macro), Cathie Wood (disruptive innovation), Nancy Pelosi (legislative alpha), Ray Dalio (macro / risk parity), Michael Burry (contrarian deep value), Jim Simons (quantitative), Michael Saylor (Bitcoin maximalism), Kevin O'Leary (cashflow & dividends), Bill Ackman (activist / concentrated), Peter Lynch (growth at a reasonable price), and Howard Marks (risk & market cycles). You can also pick one of six investing-style personas if you would rather be judged by a style than by a name.
Is my financial data private?
Yes. A roast never shows monetary amounts, only allocation percentages, asset classes, and tickers. You don't link a brokerage or bank account: you type in your holdings yourself or import a statement.